[PSL] time travel, time travel

[curriculum_fictae]

[ Martin had always known that Lukas would kill him in the end. If not along the way, then surely at the end, once he'd gotten what he wanted out of Martin, whatever that turned out to be. When the Lonely rose up to swallow him, he'd accepted his impending death with ... what?

What did he have left, really? Numbness, mostly. A hallucination of Jon in the Lonely, looking for him, but - but that was impossible, ridiculous. His mind playing cruel tricks. He settled himself down in the frigid surf, knees drawn up close to his chest, unshed tears frozen to his cheeks and lashes.

And then. A door. A door that shouldn't exist, that couldn't exist. That he shouldn't take at all. The Lonely was terrible, yes, but it was quiet, and it was peaceful. Martin was aligned enough with it by now to very nearly enjoy it, in a strange and terrible way. The Spiral would be infinitely worse than this quiet beach.

But ... it was hope, too. In a strange way. Hope enough that Martin found himself turning the door handle and stepping through, leaving the false comfort of the Lonely behind him.

The transition was unpleasant. Long. But Martin couldn't remember it after; he only remembered stumbling out through the door of a supply closet somewhere deep in the Archives, blinking up at the dim bulbs that pretended to be sufficient. What time was it? Had he escaped? Where were Lukas and Elias now?

And where was Jon? ]

Comments

[kayakking]

[There's an affirmative noise from Tim as he pushes up and starts clearing up the table. He's still rock steady on his feet, but Jon may notice the slow and very careful way he picks up the glasses and stacks them in the crook of his arm.

Clink. Clink. There's the sound of the minifridge opening again and,]

So, lets get back to the main issue.

[Because Jon doesn't actually have good luck, nor would he be able to recognize it if it mauled him.]

[eyediot]

[No he wouldn't. Especially not if it's right in front of him.

He almost sounds sleepy, sort of just drifting here.]

Hm? What was that?

[kayakking]

[It's a slow blink from Jon and ... Tim makes a call and only brings one can back over to the table.]

So.. I keep... Parts of it are just fuzzy.

[Not nearly that much, but... well. Lets lob a softball and see how it lands.]

Tell me about Algric. What's he like? Just a spooky Martin, or what?

[eyediot]

What?

[He gets a little put off by 'spooky Martin' but.] Oh. Um.

[Jon takes his glasses off to rub at his eyes a little, ending with pinching the bridge of his nose before he puts them back on.]

He's... I dunno. He's not that much different from the Martin in this timeline? Except... Less... nervous energy? He's not quite as fussy. Not in the same way.

[HIS RIDICULOUS VOCABULARY and he can't word things right while he's sloshed.]

It's like he's not trying so hard... If that makes sense.

[kayakking]

[He sets the can down in front of himself and cracks it.]

Not quite tripping over himself? Yeah, I get it. He was uh, always a bit intimidated. I think Martin was worried you hated him.

[Siiip.]

[eyediot]

I did, at the beginning.

I mean, a dog in the Archives. Really.

[kayakking]

[... SO MUCH TEMPTATION TO TEASE THERE. NOPE. KEEP IT FOCUSED, STOKER.]

So, what changed?

I mean, if we had to take a poll right now, I'd still vote him most likely to accidentally let another dog into the archives.

[eyediot]

He absolutely would.

[SIGH.]

What changed is I know it's not intentional idiocy.

[kayakking]

[Oh my god. THAT'S what he comes up with.]

How is that a step up in estimation?

[eyediot]

Because if it's accidental and not intentional, I at least know he's trying to do right.

[kayakking]

[... Maybe the right answer here IS to steer Jon away. Shit.]

Uh huh.

You know, most people would still take that as pppppretty much looking way down at them.

[eyediot]

Would you prefer I think he's not worth the time or effort he puts into the Archive? Or all the fuss and worry he does over me? Would you rather I think he's a murderer, trying to sabotage and frame me for it?

[BREATHE. Just... Breathe. Heave a sigh. Jon rests his head in one hand.]

I'm just. Saying I can believe better of him. That's all.

[kayakking]

No? No. No and extra no.

You DO know that's not how people usually frame-

[Nope. Hang on, taking another sip.]

Is that how you think of me too? Weighed out in nice easy blocks of productive to murder ration?

[eyediot]

I-- no. It's not. That, listen, Tim.

[God, how does he explain this? Does it even matter? He's already making a mess of this whole thing and he's barely been able to get it out of his own head to one person. He rests both palms against his forehead now, eyes scrunched closed.]

It doesn't matter anyway.

[kayakking]

I am! Listening.

But when you cut off with that, the last thing I'm left with is what you ACTUALLY said out loud.

[And it's not a large wedge, not really. He's certainly internalized worse. He folds his arms on the table and gives Jon a serious look over it.]

Just. Describe him to me. Without talking about work or the sinister evil plaguing our lives.

Just the GUY.

[eyediot]

[Jon doesn't even hesitate. Something about Tim's tone just gets to him when he's already stressed enough about the world, emotionally stressed about everything else, and now--]

He's nice! He's too kind, and too thoughtful, and I was suspicious until I realized it's genuine, and it scares me because I'm not worth all that!

[His breath catches and that's... Really just the whole of it. He keeps his face in his hands so hopefully Tim doesn't. See his face.]

I'm. An idiot. And I'm too stubborn for my own good, sometimes. Every. Horrible thing about myself pushed Georgie away and... Honestly it was better for her that way.

[kayakking]

[Tim settles back at that first loud statement and just, watches. A lot off guard and a ... well. Jon can't see the open expression that he settles into.

And sees the seething insecurities of every person (guy or girl) he'd sincerely asked out reply with anger at the 'prank.']

Maybe. Better, I mean.

[Hell if he actually knew, but... did know one or two things about continuing a relationship when one or both were deeply unhappy.]

... Though ... this one should be okay. They're real different people.

[He says it slowly, as if feeling it out as he does.]

[eyediot]

...They are, but I'm not.

I'm still the same. Stubborn asshole I was then. I'm not worth it.

[kayakking]

I don't think you understand. You have shown your ass so much. It's IMPRESSIVE.

[Probably not the route he'd have taken stone cold sober, but here we are.]

Like, that man has seen every last hair and pimple and still moons about in your shadow. Martin's a grown adult man. If he's like, damn I want a part of that... good chance he's noticed your actual good traits in there too.

[eyediot]

[He'll ignore the comment of anyone wanting any part of him. Not interested, and frankly he's not even drunk enough for that conversation.

Instead, Jon just... goes the whole way to rest his head on the island countertop again.]

I don't know what to do.

[kayakking]

Straight up?

[He gestures vaguely with the can.]

Tell him. Both of them. Just that you know, if that's all you can get out.

[Since if his first thought in panic at hearing about it isn't how to shut it down, but how bad he was at a relationship, he would wager...]

As these last few months have been a grade A example on how you're a bad liar even if your life depends on it. It'll just look like you'd fallen right back into 'oh no, is the employee who put a fluffy sheep tea cosy out to murder everyone who inherits the role of Head Archivist??'

[eyediot]

[Any other day, Jon would have something snappish to say back at him. Some disbelief and possibly rude thing.

But right now? This was probably the best moment to be this blunt.]

... You really think that's the best thing to do?

[kayakking]

[The answer is simple and direct, and as heartfelt as he can.]

Yeah. Yeah, I do.

[eyediot]

[Jon watches him, through the drunken haze with those piercing eyes again. Then nods.]

All right. I...

[Sigh.]

Thank you, Tim.

[kayakking]

[He reaches over, and the pat takes two paffs to land where he meant it to on Jon's back.]

Any time. Literally.

[He stands up carefully.]

Okay, I think that's enough for both of us for one night.